TEA WAHALA

THE LIPTON FIASCO I am a tea drinker or a tea drunk. , I love tea and my tea loves me . God bless my tea and God bless me.
I drink all sorts of tea and I love it from camomile tea to green tea, to mistletoe tea to moringa tea. I love my tea. Heaven and earth may fade away, but God forbid my tea fades away.

If you do agbo in a teabag I will drink it. I have different collections of teas in my house. One fateful day I ran out of tea and eventually settled for the N20.00 lipton sachets ones, but I then decided to just go and buy a packet of tea bag and off I went to the store to go buy lipton + other groceries.

There were teas and there are teas but I had a mission to accomplish, I had to conquer the unconquerable. I saw lipton tea calling on me, pick me, pick me and I picked it and what did I see on the pack “open to win an suv “. I can actually drink tea and win and ESSUUUHUUVEEE!!! I CAN kill two birds with one stone. Somebody shout halleluyah!!!

I used my hand picked up the tea, put it in the shopping basket alongside other groceries, walked up to the till, removed money from my back pocket, smiled at the cashier while thinking of the beautiful ESSUUHUUUVEE , paid the cashier, collected my balance, carried my groceries, bye-byed the cashier, opened the door my self , called okada, climbed okada, alighted at my destination, power walked to my house, opened my gate, entered my house, sat down brought out my lipton tea bag… ( ESSUUUHUUVEEE IS MINE) , tore the wrap , opened the pack NO ESSUUUHUUUVEE inside the pack, no RAFFLE TICKET not even a TRY YOUR LUCK NEXT TIME.

Nay, they cant come and go and fall my hand like this na, no way.
I gave them the benefit of doubt . I boiled water expecting a secret message in the tea like asking me to solve a riddle or something. ( from something out of professor snape’s classes)

NOTHING!!
NO ESSHUUUVEEE!!!!!!!!! I thought it was factory error. Finished that PACKET went and bought another packet. Same thing ni oh. NO ESSHUUUVEEE!

IS THIS LIFE?
IS IT FAIR TO ALL CONCERNED!!!!
PS:: I have gone back to my PG TIPS biko.
from the archives of a mischievous imagination of a crazy babe. still crazy after all these years.

(c) IYALODE 2014