Monday 25 March 2013

AKPRADO THE GIVER!

The Gospel as recorded in the book of Dashington Chapter 1: 1-15

1.
And thou shalt soar thy wild oats upon the land and have many baby mamas.
2.
Thou shalt have half a score
3.
Wherefore thou shalt waketh up one day and decided to take the bone of thy bone
4.
And thou shalt arise and proceedeth to the land of Ibom which lieth the town of Yuo
5.
Ye shalt choose upon thy self a handmaiden( one of thy bàby mamas) from the lineage of Mac as wife.
6.
And thou shalt be merry with all pomp and pageantry.
7.
And this union shall be pleasing in the sight of the king of yuo and he shall bestow upon thee and thy handmaiden and gift of a beast from the east and thou shalt name the beast "PRADO".
8.
And now thou shalt proceed across the waters to a land where thou shalt be joined in holy matrimony with thy handmaiden.
9.
Thou shalt steal the shine from whoever tieth the knot on that day.
10.
Thou shalt infiltrate social media and trend on twitter.
11.
And behold, a man called David the son of Mark shall bestow upon thee another. gift and thou shalt name it FERRARI .
12.
And the people shalt screameth and curseth the son of Mark for such evils.
13.
And thou shalt return to thy father's land and take care of thy baby mamas
14.
And thou shalt seek out Ximena the daughter of Ona-A
15.
And thou shalt give her the ferrari and the Lord shalt bless thee and thy soul unto this day.
FROM the mischievous imagination of a crazy babe still crazy after all these years (C) 2013

Friday 1 March 2013

ALARINKA'S COMING TO TOWN

ALARINKA IS COMING TO TOWN

Tune : Santa clause is coming to town.
Singing

“you better watch out,

You better not pout,

Better hide all ur shekpe bottles

Ala rinka’s coming to town”

His going around

Like a yoyo

Gonna find out

Who’s jobless as he

Alarinka’s coming to town “


Why is he coming to town? 1 wonder, its not like its Christmas or something . I don’t want to get bored but I heard from someone who heard from someone who had from someone that alarinka is on a good governance tour.


Good governance tour of what or who or why?

“What is being good governance ?” “Who is being good governed? “ Good governance for what?

Good governance of a visionless era?

Good governance of one bomb / week ?

Good governance of fuel subsidy removal?

Good governance of corruption?

Good governance of changing university names?

Good governance of inconsistent stories?

Or abi is it good governance of cassava bread?


MAY THE LORD FORGIVE ALL THOSE THAT DESERVE TO BE FORGIVABLE. AMEN


Who asked him to do excursion? Oga oh, the geography teacher must be in a good mood oh, And parents of the good governance school must be extremely generous to fund this good governance excursion( tax payers money)

So now that Alarinka is going about sharing the good governance tidings? Someone tell me how does his visit affect the price of fish in the market.

Or does it prevent ori (Shea butter) from melting in the sun)

Or because Alarinka is coming to town I should now come and use ladder and climb knorr cube ?

Or use curry paste as liquid foundation?

And I heard that a certain ruler in far away igodomigodo land warned alarinka about his visit to his palace. Its not everyone that has time for irinkurin.

Some people have work to do nau.

Any one who wakas like alarinka is just looking for abuku and that was what he got when the ruler of igodomigodo land told him to bring along his food items when he is coming to town? Afterall , whenever you go visiting you don’t go empty handed, you must bear gifts of physical gifts and not gifts of good governance.

Is when you don’t have work to do that you begin to loiter the streets under the pretext of good governance tour.

He shall should remember that arinka nja bata sha.

And if he doesn’t have work to do , he should keep Nigeria clean by picking up the pieces of refuse as he waka’s about town.

Then we can now say we have come and have good governance of “keep Nigeria Clean”.
. from the archives of the mischievous imagination of a crazy babe. still crazy after all these years. ximena (c)2013